A Perspective Check and Re-check

Logging back on after a long hiatus to post some thoughts. My grandpa died yesterday, and it's hit my mom's side of the family extremely hard. I didn't really get to know my grandpa that well, so I feel somewhat removed from the grief. He lived in California, and I visited my grandparents infrequently, growing up. Of course, I know my grandpa in the sense that I could recognize him in a crowd, but I don't really know him. My cousins, on the other hand, know him very well. He used to walk both of them to school each day. My mom said they were weeping bitterly at the hospital when they pulled him off the tubes. 

My grief feels impersonal, and I honestly hate that. It wasn't until this afternoon, during my lunch break at the office when a cheeky older coworker asked me why I was glued to my phone (cue millennial jokes), that I burst into tears and told her I was searching for flights to California to attend my grandpa's funeral. 

So when I got the text from my mom telling me he had peacefully passed, I was more shook by the finality of it all. My mom said that she was glad that he was no longer suffering and could be at peace. I just couldn't help thinking, if a non-Christian dies, the worst suffering is actually just beginning. 

Despite my mom's tenacious evangelizing to my grandpa for years now, we're not sure my grandpa actually came to Lord.  

I think this is a wake-up call for me. It's so easy to become complacent. I'm in a great, peachy bubble. Great job, amazing boyfriend, wonderful housing situation (more on this later). There's not much I have to worry about. It's really a season of abundance, for which I am exceedingly grateful for. I get to go to church and worship without fear of persecution (all part of going through the motions, right?), joke around and eat snacks with Christian friends, mindlessly read my Bible that isn't banned. It's just too easy to forget about your non-Christian friends and take the easy road out by keeping your mouth shut. I need to prioritizing preaching the good news of Jesus Christ. Let death, let eternity teach us all how to live. 

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